Wednesday, June 10, 2009

12 weeks, first full OB appointment,feeling down and u/s results on hematoma

Well I am 12 weeks today.The baby sure looks different in my ticker now,what a change.I had my first OB appointment today at which I got the wonderful old papsmear and pelvic check.She also checked the heartbeat with a doppler which she found it imeddiately.I am jealous of their doppler as it is heavy duty and sensitive.Oh well the bigger the baby gets the easier it will be for me to find it.I did get permission to go to a wedding that we are supposed to attend on saturday,but I was instructed to take it easy,nothing crazy.As if,I haven't been feeling that good lately plus the stress of the hematoma so there is no way I would even consider anything beyond eating and maybe a couple slow dances with hubby.We have already decided we are not staying long.I have been put on modified bed rest which allows me to do a few more things but no lifting,cleaning or ummm intimate relations with dh. :-( I also have to rest often and take lots of breaks with feet up.The u/s showed that the hematoma had increased in size from 4.7 X 1.7 to 5.2 X 3.0 X 3.0. I do not know why I was not given a third measurement on the first one but I wasn't.I cried yesterday after I found out I felt like I spent 3 weeks on bed rest and it didn't get any better.Being on bedrest has brought on some depression for me, along with the frustration that nothing fits.I have tried searching craigslist and classified in my area but it seems like all the maternity clothes around me are for X-XS-M.I wish I was that small but I'm just not.Where in the world are all the women who wear L-XL maternity?? I have had plenty of time to search the web with no luck on stuff I can afford.I wish I could be out checking yard sales but I am still not allowed a ton of walking.They said they may let me go to the ZOO this summer but DH would most likely have to push me around in a wheelchair.Sorry I am so down but I have been a roller coaster ride these last 3 weeks.I have been crying more often as I miss out on things and people never come to see me.And some barely call it's as if I have just fallen off the earth.I feel forgotten at times.I don't have a lot of family and who I do have just doesn't seem concerned or like I they expect me to MC since I have before.So they don't really acknowledge my PG.Maybe me thinking that, that is what they are thinking is in my head but it sure feels that way.Sometimes I wish I had family that was supportive,that wanted to visit,to drop off a meal,that called after my appointments to see how things are.But I just don't and it hurts and I have plenty of time to think about it as I rest.On the postive the longer I make the better the chance for the baby,they said today that most of the hematomas resolve themselves by 20 weeks.I am 8 weeks away from 20 weeks so I am praying it leaves by then.If it doesn't then it will most likely stick around for the whole pregnancy and possibly cause preterm labor.My next appointment is on Monday and they will order another u/s at that time.I will everyone posted.Also lately my PIO shots have been really hurting me,like to point of crying.My skin on my hips and backside sting all the way across like a horrible sunburn (it won't go away) and when the PIO goes in lately it feels like my skin is going to burst as it burns and aches so bad.I have no idea why they have gotten so much worse expect that maybe my backside has most likely had enough.It is hard to be on bedrest when your backside hurts so much.I just can't seem to get comfortable anymore.Sorry for such a depressed post but I can't shake it right now.

11 comments:

Mimi said...

I am so sorry honey. I wish I lived closer so I could come and visit you. Hang in there. You went through so much to conceive. I know you will get through this. Take one day at a time! HUGS!

Kami

blessedmomto7 said...

I'm SO SORRY you are in the dumps girl. I will be praying you through and lifting you up. Feel free to email me and I will call to check on you :) I had similar feelings when I had 4 babies (adopted) at one time, I just FELL OFF THE FACE and had little support. BUT, I made it to the other side and you will too. Pray, read your Bible and God will answer your prayers! HUGS!!

Jen

Jen said...

Hey Megan,

I have been interested- only checking to see if you have updated your blog literally 6+ times a day!!! Your are going to give birth to this beautiful baby!!! The past 3 weeks have not been for nothing- the baby is still alive and growing!!! You have a huge online support network who loves you and is concerned about you!!!!

Hugs!!!

Mrz. Hannah Myhre said...

sorry that you have been feeling down sweetie.. Enjoy your self at that wedding your planing to go to!!

Praying for you!!!

Hugs,
Hannah

Fullers1006 said...

Hang in there! It will get better! Just an idea for maternity clothes.. don't know if you have a ross.. but I got ALL my maternity clothes from there! They actually have a pretty good selection. You may not be able to go out but if you can try them! I hope you feel better! Praying for you and your little bambino!

twondra said...

Oh sweetie, it kills me that you're down. I don't want to bother you if you're not in the mood to talk (I know how it is when you're depressed and want to be left alone). But, please respond to this if you want to talk and I will call you sweetie.

love ya girl! (((HUGS)))

Michele said...

bedrest can make you blue. i completely understand. i am so sorry that your family isnt helping bring you up. it's hard. as to maternity wear, i totally understand. i went looking for maternity clothes and it was insane. everything small! i even checked ebay! at this point, i just need my PJs and yoga pants, which i can still wear, but i'd hoped to find something. oh well.

sending warm thoughts and hoping that you are able to have some pleasant visitors and help.

Ashley said...

I'm sorry that you are feeling down!! I wish I could come and visit you!! ((HUGS))

Katie said...

In regards to having troubles finding maternity clothes I have gotten most of mine on ebay in new condition, there are a lot of sellers that sell "lots" of clothes giving you several mix and match outfits, and they have large and x-large.

Hang in there, pregnancy is a lot harder than many ever imagined but in the end it will be worth it- I just know it!!

Meant to be a mom said...

I'm so sorry to hear that your having such a hard time. HUGS HUGS HUGS!! 8 weeks isn't that far off and I will pray and pray that by then it will be corrected.
About the maternity clothes. I haven't tried Ross but that's a great idea. Have you looked online at Target?

Thinking of you and praying for you sweetie!

Nichole said...

I am so sorry you are feeling blue! I am even more sorry you don't live closer, I would be on your doorstep in a heartbeat! I will look at Craigslist here and if I find any maternity clothes I will ship them to you ok?

Please know that we are out here in cyber space loving on you and your little one. I am sure it is very lonely right now, but we are with you in spirit!

Email anytime you want ok?

Love and Hugs

My snowflake items

My snowflake items
DH got me these after we officially accepted our set of snowflake babies