Thursday, May 28, 2009

Official update

The doctor's office called yesterday but I am just now getting around to posting as my computer is way slow for some reason.I had a friend of mine that fixes computers come over and he thinks it's my modem so I have to call the Internet company tomorrow, lets hope they replace it for free.Bad time for it is one of the only things getting me through bed rest.Well the nurse called and her report on the baby was the same as DH told me.And she said the baby is measuring ahead again.I was 9w6d at the u/s on Tuesday but they said the baby was measuring 10w2d that day. So that is encouraging as it means it is doing well. They gave me a closer due date of December 21st but I haven't changed my ticker as I want to see what the doctor has to say.They did however find something during the u/s apparently I have a subchorionic hematoma.I am unsure of the size at this point but I will get more info when I see the doctor on the 2nd of June until then I have googled it and not found as much as I would like on it. The nurse did say that I have to stay on bed rest and continue PIO at this point.They said that the hematoma can up the chance of miscarriage but doesn't mean I will have one either. Apparently it puts me more at risk as it is a tear in the placenta between it and the uterine wall and it could tear away more and then I could have a possible mc.We are praying for it to heal as sometimes they resolve themselves.They can stay and cause a women to bleed through her pg and still have a healthy baby. And lastly they can increase the chance of mc. If anyone out there knows anything about this or anyone that has had this could help me out with info about it I would greatly appreciate it.The second sac has not been ruled out as the cause of the pink fluid I lost last Tuesday, I will talk more to the OB about that on Tuesday.I ordered the doppler yesterday and the company says it was shipped yesterday so it should be here very soon.I think it will help give us some comfort through all this, before it was a want but now DH and I feel more like it's a need.We decided to purchase instead of renting as I found a company that sells them that was selling the same one that I was considering from another site that rents and sells them, but mine was cheaper. The site I used has a special for $20.00 off plus free shipping and a free digital thermometer with your purchase.Plus they include a storage case for the doppler and the other didn't say that it did.All in all it was a better deal.The price we paid was what it would cost to rent it for about 5 months. Considering we have just over 6 months to go it made since to just buy it and then we own it forever.We can use it for our next child too then.If anyone wants the site just let me know and I will pass it on to you.The sale I am sure is ending soon since it is a memorial day sale.But as of yesterday it was still going on.Well girls I am heading off of here for now but I am posting a 10 week belly shot before I do :-)

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Still monkeying around

Well where should I begin.I called my OB's office today with a question and it was "would I get the results of the u/s today?" Their response was "no, the tech at the hospital is not allowed to tell you anything,the results are relayed to the doctor and then they will interpret them and call you" She said she understood and was sorry but it was policy.So that frustrated me from the get go.So hubby and I devised a plan to get as much info on our own as possible.After all it's our baby and all we wanted to know was if it was still alive.So I assigned him a job of not taking his eyes off the monitor, I said don't worry about me watch the monitor.We have had 3 u/s before today so we have become attuned to finding the measurements and what a lot of it means.I told him whatever you do look for the bpm and the measurements in centimeters.We both also know what the heartbeat/flicker looks like and I warned him that they would not be turning on the sound so please look closely.I knew that it would be hard for me to see anything good as they were not doing this u/s to show me anything but to create a report for the doctor.I knew me laying on my back looking at the screen sideways and not having it pointed exactly towards me would make it harder for me to have a could view of numbers etc.So she started the u/s (my first abdominal one ever, I was expecting another vaginal one but was glad for the change)I thought I would at least see if she could tell me the size of the baby or how it was etc ( i had to try), but as they had said she said "I can't tell you anything it's against policy, I 'm sorry".So she was moving right along taking all the pics and getting several shots, she was moving very fast through it all.And then there was a great shot of the baby (which I was able to see) and all of the sudden it jumped! I mean jumped like it was dancing. I said did the baby just move? And DH said very confidently "Yes it did".The tech then said that "sometimes you get the answers to your own questions" Which we took as a affirmative answer to if the baby was okay. The baby also waved an arm it was so cute.I cried after the first shot of the baby dancing it felt like a huge wave of relief came over me.DH said he saw the baby kick a leg too later after the wave.After everything was all done and the lady was out of ear shot DH said "BPM were 182 and the size is 3.39 cm.And I saw the heartbeat" I was so proud of him that he got all the info that his worried wife needed.We said later that our baby was making sure to show it's mommy that it was ok and that even if the tech wouldn't tell us it was ok that it would show the tech up by making it obvious for us and doing a little dance, wave and kick.I already knew what size the baby needed to be approximately to have grown like it was supposed to over the 5 days since the last u/s. The average size at 10 weeks is 3.1 and our was 3.39cm at 9w6d, just a day short of 10 weeks. But either way it is growing wonderful and a bit ahead. The Bpm/hear beat was at 182 which is the same as the u/s we had 5 days ago. And the heartbeat needs to be at least 150 bpm so again the heartbeat was great. I have had no new blood only old discharge that is brown/rust and tan colored.I am beginning to think that it was a second sac like my OB wondered.I was talking to dh a few days ago and I said remember our last(normal)appointment at the RE, the one where they released me to the OB?" "Remember when they were doing the u/s and the RE saw something on the left side of me and kept saying I wonder what that is,what is that, hmm that must be her ovary."I was in a decent amount of pain when he was pressing on my abdomen trying to get my ovary or whatever was in a better view. I had a lot of tenderness that reminded me of cysts I have had.He finally dismissed it as just being my ovary but never really was sure. He asked the intern what she thought, of course she really didn't say anything only agreed with him.That whole u/s and appointment was one week before the bleeding incident on last Thursday.So I am now wondering if what they saw was an extra sac since after I went in on Thursday he never mentioned seeing that on my left side that time and had no trouble finding my ovaries and the matching cysts on them in mere seconds.Nothing like that appointment when he was digging around with the vaginal u/s and pushing on my abdomen to try to see things better.So there you have it girls our little monkey is still monkeying around.It's jumping and dancing in its mommy's tummy and doing well. PRAISE GOD!!! I am still on bedrest and PIO shots.I will talk to the OB office when they call tomorrow with my official results. Thank you all again for your continued prayers and support I really appreciate them.((HUGS))

Monday, May 25, 2009

Waiting for tuesday

Well Sunday was our 1 year anniversary.I didn't think we would be spending it like this,me on bed rest and us worrying about our baby.After I posted about the bleeding starting again on saturday it continued for a few hours but never ended up amounting to more than 2-3 quarter sized spots on my pad.Which is reassuring.Since then it has stopped and turned to brown/tan again.Which I know is old blood and nothing to worry about.I am staying hopeful and positive that the baby is fine and that it was just a second sac/blood from a 2nd pregnancy that didn't take.I am so ready for our ultrasound on Tuesday.I think if it goes well and I have no more bleeding until then I will feel more confident that the baby will be fine.Here are the pics of the baby from Thursday when we had to go in and everything started.The RE said the baby looked great and so did my OB when I showed her the pics and told her the heartbeat rate.My OB said if the bpm had been closer to 110 then it is more worrisome.But the baby was at 182.7 bpm.I again want to thank you all for your support and prayers. I am sorry I haven't been a very good commentor but be assured I am reading all your blogs.((HUGS))

Saturday, May 23, 2009

woke at 8am more bleeding

I got up to go potty this morning and when I discovered I was bleeding again.Not on my pad but when I wiped.Bright red again and it was more than a tiny amount.The doctor said it could come and go and that even if it stopped it could come back.I am trying to feel comforted that he said this but it's hard.I feel like tuesday is forever away I wish I could have the u/s today.This is hard girls.The only thing that is slighty reassuring is I have no cramping and haven't through this whole ordeal.

Friday, May 22, 2009


Today was pretty uneventful and kind of boring being on bed rest but I know it's for the best.My bleeding actually slowed way down by early evening last night.By 10pm there was no red blood at all only very light pink spotting, this continued but was only when I wiped there was nothing on my pad at all.By this morning the pink was all but gone when I wiped and was replaced later in the afternoon with tan to brown old blood/discharge.I haven't felt anything out of the ordinary today.I am not looking forward to all of PIO shots but I know they are necessary.The first 2 I have had have left my rump very sore.I am anxious for my u/s on Tuesday as I am scared that something could be wrong even if I am not bleeding.I just want to see our beautiful baby and see how it's doing again.We are so in love with our little monkey already and just want it to stay safe until it's time to be born. Thank you, all you wonderful girls for the support,prayers and encouraging words, I have appreciated them more than you know and love you all for it.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

threatened miscarriage...Please pray!

Let me start from the begining.I was in bed at like 7:45 am sound asleep and then I was woke up slightly to a warm gush that I could feel was coming from my umm hoo hoo.I was very out of it so I chalked it up to the progeseterone suppository gushing out as happens with those things.In retrospect it was a much gushier/watery feeling, but like I said I was dead asleep and only woke for a few seconds after feeling that.Well fast forward about a half an hour and I woke up this time to feeling like I was drenched in sweat.I then realized that it was only the lower half of me that was wet.I in a disorientated state felt the bed under me and it was wet.I brought my hand to my face to check for blood, I didn't see any.I then turned over to see a light pink spot on my white sheets that was about as big as a baseball.I then woke my husband and darted to the bathroom.Once I was in there I saw that my medium absorbancy pad was saturated with pink fluid.Maybe diluted blood.My underwear and pj bottoms had a good amount on them too.I was not bleeding when I wiped but I almost fainted in the bathroom.I had sweat running down my chest.And I am not a person who gets sweaty.I lost my hearing and I knew I was going out soon.I put head down towards my feet and sat until it passed.DH was scared but supportive I was impressed at his ability to stay realtivly calm even though I could tell he was scared.I then started making calls.The first was to my OBGYN who was not open yet.Second I called my RE's office which I was only getting everyones voicemail so I actually used the emergency option on the menu and it worked, before I knew it I was talking to the receptionist and I told her what was happening.She then passed a message on and said the nurse would call me back.I then called my OBGYN as they were open at this point, telling them what was happening and they said to keep my appointment at 2:45pm since I wasn't bleeding bright red blood.After I got off the phone with them my RE called back and I told them what was going on.She then said she would talk to the doctor and see about getting me in and she would call me back shortly.Well on my next trip to the bathroom there it was the bright red blood and there was a decent amount of it.So DH called the obgyn to tell them and and they said to go to the ER.After he hung up the RE's office called and said they could see me at 1pm.I told her about the bright red blood and she said to come in right then instead because they can do an u/s right there.So we headed out and I sat in tears and silence sobbing on the way there.It is an hour drive which felt like forever.We got there and when we were taken back and they permormed an u/s.I was crying at this point scared to see the baby without a heartbeat.He was performing the u/s and said look can you see the heartbeat and I replied that I couldn't see it (i was in tears during this)and he then turned on the sound and we heard the babys heart it was at 182.7bmp. He also said that there was plenty of fluid around it and that it looked good.They did note that I have cysts on both ovaries but that they were of no concern, I however do have pain on the left side by my ovary assumbably from the cyst.They were perplexed at what the fluid might be and tried say it may be urine.I tried explaining that I felt it come from my hoo hoo no where else.I know that there are plenty of you out there that would agree that you can feel something pass through your hoo hoo.It's just a sensation that you are well aware of.He then said I was having a threatened miscarriage and now I am on strict bedrest.I was continuing to bleed heavier while they did the u/s.He also switched me to PIO shots instead of the suppositories as I am unable to absorb them while I am bleeding.The only pharmacy here that carries it only had one bottle even though my script calls for more.I will be on it longer than that.I decided to keep my appointment at my obgyn because I really wanted to update her and get so more input on things.I this time also took in my pad from when I was sleeping that was full of fluid(in a baggie of course) as I meant to take it to the RE but forgot it. She agreed that it was not urine but slightly bloody fluid.She asked how many embies we had transferred and were we sure that only one took?I said that is all they have ever told us.She wondered if there was an extra sac from one that didn't make it and that was the fluid from it after it ruptured.Which is interesting because DH and had wondered that same thing just before we saw her.She did not do an u/s but I showed her the pics from this morning and she said that it all looked very good and that she liked the baby's heartrate that the RE had gotten.She then has scheduled me for an u/s on the 26th which is in 5 days.She also is getting me in to see her on the 1st.I will still have my full OB appointment on the 10th.My OB was so compasionte and understanding.So girls all I can do is wait and wonder and be terrified.I have no more fluid coming out but am still bleeding but it has slowed down since i have been in bed.So please we could use all the prayers we can get as we are sad and scared.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

First OB appointment tomorrow and the theme for the babys room

Well I managed to get in to my OB office after I called and and explained that my RE really wanted me to be seen sooner than a month and also that I have a history of infertility and mc's.They are also getting me in sooner because of my horrible migraines.I will not be having the first full OB appointment, this will be just to go over my meds (progesterone and estrogen) and also my headaches.I will however have the full appointment on June 10th. My appointment tomorrow is at 2:45pm so I will update everyone when I get back.I had a interesting moment with my oldest son tonight as I was cleaning up the kitchen he said "momma your baby in your belly is getting bigger,I can see you tummy getting bigger" I knew my tummy was sticking out more but I guess I did not realize how noticeable it was. I know I just feel chunkier lately not like I look pregnant.But the weight gain or swelling is all in my bb's and tummy.I still feel like an outsider around pregnant women.I feel like I am an impostor and at any minute I will be found out.I know this is irrational but while I know this pregnancy is real it can be very hard for me to feel it's real.I am considering getting a doppler as I think it will help put my mind at ease and continue to let see how real this blessing really is.We have began to plan our nursery theme it will be a jungle theme.Mostly monkeys.We already have our bedding set which I included pictures of.We also purchased a bassinet off the list that craig made. It's beautiful! The very first thing we bought for the baby was the monkey in the pictures.We refer to the baby as our little monkey sometimes, so it is very fitting.I have to say the neatest thing this week is that the baby is now looking like a baby.Wow that happens fast!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Todays U/S and a catch up about mothers day and I finally graduated!!

**I had some blog troubles and I had to copy and paste in order to save this post,the original had to be deleted.So the comments that were already there I copied too as I did not want to lose anything all my girls had to say.Sorry for the jumbled mess**

So first things first.I realize I am a bit late in posting regarding mothers day but better late than never. We went to church that morning, which included me,Bryan, the boys and my mom.I know that most IF'ers dread church on mothers day because they usually single out the mothers in the congregation leaving the women struggling with IF to feel left out.It has been awhile since that was how I felt since I was blessed in be able to adopt my boys. But the thought and memory of what it must be like for my fellow IF'ers still is strong in my mind as well as what it felt like for me back before my boys. My heart went out to everyone that day that was struggling and it still does.I do have to say that my church has taken such a refreshing path on mothers day that I know won't fix the infertility struggles that women in the congregation may have but at least they won't feel singled out. My church has a newer method of celebrating mothers day than several others, in that they do not ask who is a mother and they do not only give mothers a flower. But instead they invite ALL women to come forward that are 18 and over because they want all women to know that they are precious and loved no matter what role they are at in their life.And everyone that does receives a flower.I think it is such a wonderful way to do that since we are all either a mother or a daughter and we're important to our loved ones no matter where we are in the road of life.After church we can back to our house where DH and I had prepared lasagna, veggies , garlic bread and strawberry pie.It was a very nice meal and my idea to stay in rather than fight the crowds and spend lots of extra money we don't really have on dining out. My husband got me a willow tree figure called "cherish".It is the pregnant one which is what I really wanted since he had gotten me one before we were married called "promise" and I wanted to add to it. He also got me a second one for mothers day from the boys called "quietly" which has a toddler and another older child with a mother. I thought his choices were so thoughtful and sweet. The boys sat there and pointed to the pregnant one saying" that is momma with a baby in her belly". My oldest was saying "that's momma, that's me and that's brother." when he was showing me the second statue from him and his brother It was so cute and amazing how little minds work.They both had birthdays just recently and now are newly 4 and 6 years old.I will be including a 8 week belly shot in this post( I took it a few days ago,pardon the jammies ) and also our u/s pic from today.Our appointment went wonderful today and we actually got to hear the heartbeat.It was amazing.The heartbeat was at 168 bpm and the baby now measures 18mm in size it almost quadrupled in 2 weeks and 2 days since my last ultrasound.My doctor was like "that is a big baby!" He said it looked wonderful and that everything looks right on track. So now I officially have graduated to my OBGYN. I called and made an appointment today but they can't get me in until June 10th.Which is almost 4 weeks away.My doctor wanted me to be seen in 2-3 weeks but that will be 3 weeks and 5 days at that point. I hate waiting that long but I guess I have no choice.It was so neat because the baby actually is looking like a baby in the ultrasound.It kind of has a Kewpie doll look and build right now (I am including a pic of a Kewpie doll for those who may be too young to remember them or have never heard of them,my mom was/is an antique collector so I had no choice but to know of them lol)We have another u/s pic to share from today too.I was so prepared for bad news when i went today as I am always scared before the u/s's.I always feel like something could happen and I would not realize it.I was relieved when everyone in the room was all happy and excited for me and telling me how good the baby was doing.And when I say everyone I mean all 4 people besides myself.There was a female intern that was very sweet, my doctor, my husband and then also my donor coordinator that called me yesterday "just because". She is so sweet and we have become more like friends/family then me being her patient.She called to see how I was doing and I told her of my upcoming u/s and she was so excited and asked if it was ok if she came in for it. I was of course flattered and said "yes".Officially her job is and has been done with me but she has continued to follow my story and progress.They also have made me promise and this includes the receptionist who knows me by name to bring in the baby after it's born.I love my RE's office and people and will miss them all but I know this is a good thing that I am moving to my OBGYN.And we do still have 3 snow babies on ice so I know we will be back before I know it as time moves so fast.Well girls this post has become longer than I intended but I wanted to update you all and share some pics.((hugs)) to all of you and God Bless!

Posted by Angelwingsbaby at 4:10 PM
Stacie said...
OMG, your U/S's are adorable. When I saw them, it took me back to why my baby girl was the tiny in my womb! SO exciting. Enjoy every minute of it, it will go by quicker than you can expect.

May 15, 2009 6:09 PM
Jen said...
I am so happy for you!!!! Congrats!!! I pray I am @ 6.5 weeks behind you!!! I love the belly shot!!!


May 15, 2009 6:59 PM
Jen&Carter said...
Yah, I am glad that you had a good appt and that you have graduated up. Congrats.

May 15, 2009 7:19 PM
Mrz. Hannah Myhre said...
Love the pics.. Glad to see everything is going well for you:)


May 15, 2009 8:08 PM
blessedmomto7 said...
You graduated! THAT ROCKS! Love the picture of the belly and the way your church handles Mom's day!

May 15, 2009 10:04 PM
Jen said...
I sent you a private email with a very important question @ FET meds which is driving me nuts!!! Please respond.

May 15, 2009 11:23 PM
twondra said...
LOVE the u/s picture! It's soooo cute!

Glad you had a good Mother's Day. :)

I miss talking to you, too. :) We definitely need to chat again. :)

May 16, 2009 7:35 AM
Dr. Hill's Mrs. said...
Congratulations on your continued successful pregnancy! I love how your church has adapted its Mother's Day service- wish mine would do that. I had an excuse not to attend because I was traveling home from a work trip. Still it was a brutal day. I am so excited to see your ultrasound photos! God bless this baby!

May 16, 2009 2:52 PM
Michele said...
Love your willow tree figures. I collect those and each has a special little memory.

So glad things are going well!

May 16, 2009 8:14 PM
Sarah said...
Congrats again on such a beautiful, healthy looking fetus! Before you now it you'll find out the sex. Are you going to find out? I'm just so excited for you! It's so hard to believe that I'm done and am never going to experiance that again. I'm so very blessed and am not complaining though. My tubes were damaged for a reason and I know that 3 was enough for me :)

Keep us posted :)

May 16, 2009 8:50 PM
hopefaithlove said...
YOu u/s looks like a little gummy bear, so excited for you... on a side note I skipped Mother's day I thought pregnancy hormones mixed with IF thoughts would make me lose it.

May 16, 2009 10:18 PM

Saturday, May 9, 2009

upcoming u/s

My next u/s is Friday may 15th so about a week away now.Everything is going well here.Still adjusting to the idea that I am actually pg.But since my tummy has swollen to new proportions it is hard to not have reality set in.I finally picked up a couple of new bras that were a whole cup size bigger this week as I was bulging out of the others.I did not think all the swelling and bloating would happen so soon.But I guess everyone is different.The cramping has settled down a lot.The new thing I have been experiencing is headaches.Long lingering headaches that Tylenol doesn't touch.Actually Tylenol has never worked for me so why should it now.Does anyone know any safe treatment of headaches like home remedies while you are pg? My last headache lasted for three days I would go to sleep with and wake up with it daily. Also does anyone have any book recommendations?I did pick up "what to expect when you are expecting" like my RE recommend but are there any other good ones.All of this is new to me as I never made it this far before in my earlier pg's.And even up to the same point I never had any symptoms only a BFP on a stick.I never had the blood tests, never saw the heartbeat, they just didn't watch me that close. This has been my first u/s ever that I have seen the baby that I am carrying as the only one I had before was during one of my mc's.Everything about this pg is different but I think that is good even if I can't fit into anything I own and have been experiencing some nausea and throwing up.It may sound strange but some of these not so fun symptoms are comforting as they let me know that things are progressing and the baby is doing well.I am excited for my upcoming u/s as we will be released if it goes well to my OBGYN.Well girls I should go as we are getting up early to go to yard sales and find some much needed things for the baby.I didn't think I was gonna ever have another baby to raise so we have some bargain hunting to do because if we don't find stuff now it will be winter when the baby comes.And there are no yard sales in the late fall winter time.So we are trying to plan ahead so we can try to afford everything.Well God bless and sorry I have been a bad blogger lately but the headaches keep me down and away from the computer.

My snowflake items

My snowflake items
DH got me these after we officially accepted our set of snowflake babies